I remember
Waking early that morning
Worrying
Staying home from school with feigned sickness
but really feeling sick
Waiting for the parents to leave
Taking the test kit hidden in my bedroom to the bathroom
Reading the directions more times than needed
Filling the test tube, adding the solution, waiting
Pacing
Counting the minutes
I remember
Looking at the test tube
Seeing the “doughnut” floating in the glass
Sweating, heart racing, nauseated, terrified
Pregnant
Throwing the test tube down the sewer
Walking to school in a trance
Praying for it all to be a dream
I remember
Peeking in the little window in the door of his classroom
Making eye contact
Shaking my head
Lowering my tear filled eyes
Him slamming his head down on the desk
Not looking back up
Going to history class
Aching to awaken.
submitted for Poets United, Verse First, I Remember
