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Poetry is just the evidence of life. If your life is burning well, poetry is just the ash. Leonard Cohen

Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Grief


image from Magpie Tales 54
Grief is a puzzle with the pieces askew
Another part missing each time you glance
You try to find meaning but don't have a clue
Trip over your own feet in this macabre dance.

Another part missing each time you glance
You try to believe but it doesn't seem true
Trip over your own feet in this macabre dance
Your love is dead and you want to die too.

You try to believe but it doesn't seem true
You walk through your life now as if in a trance
Your love is dead and you want to die too
You can't work this puzzle-there is no chance.

You walk through your life now as if in a trance
There's dust in your heart where once lush gardens grew
You can't work this puzzle-there is no chance
No longer a framework in which to hew.

                                                                   There's dust in your heart where once lush gardens grew
                                                                   You try to find meaning but don't have a clue
                                                                   No longer a framework in which to hew
                                                                   Grief is a puzzle with the pieces askew. 

                                                                   submitted for Mag 54

20 comments:

thingy said...

Very sad piece.

Grief truly is like a puzzle with many missing pieces.

Helen said...

This kind of grief is overwhelming .... one wonders if it is ever possible to overcome.

Christine said...

Yes grief feels like broken pieces, but eventually those pieces of life all fit again, sometimes it's the picture of the puzzle that changes.

Lyn said...

Am I right..a Pantoum? One of my favorite forms..The repetition really works in a very hypnotic way..like this a lot!

trisha said...

capturing pain, any feeling in form poems is quite a tough game. You did it wonderfully.

trisha.

120 Socks said...

Loved the form in this poem, it worked really well, and very moving content.

Martin H. said...

Grief, when nothing seems to fit anymore. Nicely written piece.

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LovkynÄ› said...

wow, you captured that feeling perfectly!

nene said...

wonderfully poignant possibly to the level of being a catharsis for someone.

Doctor FTSE said...

Grief conveyed very well in this traditional form.

Tumblewords: said...

Oh, how true. Sadly so.

Kristen Haskell said...

Grief is a puzzle and I am trying myself to work through the different pieces but somedays I just can't seem to find the edges.

Trellissimo said...

This fits puzzle pieces well, beacause of the repetitions. How often do we pck up a piece before we find its correct reating place in the final picture?

Tess Kincaid said...

So poignant. Perfect metaphor for grief.

Kavita said...

(sigh)... it's so sad.. but so very true too...
It's very hard to find the right pieces of this macabre puzzle called life, when it is hit by grief...
So well written, Lola.. and I am totally awe-inspired by your rhyme scheme! I mean, you've used only TWO rhymes for the ENTIRE poem... that's like WOW!!!

Kudos on this excellent magpie, my friend!!

Lolamouse said...

Kavita,
Thank you so much for your thoughtful and kind comments. I really appreciate it.

Lena said...

Pieced many a puzzle, too. Heartfelt 'pie!

Promising Poets Parking Lot said...

smart piece.

Rachel Hoyt said...

It's a Pantoum!!!! Excellent use of the form. The repetition works really well here.

Sherry Blue Sky said...

This is really beautiful. The rhythm and rhyming are perfect and the repetition really works well. Super-good writing!