The dogs start yapping
before the doorbell even rings
I open it
about a foot
and there they are
the elders
twin penguins
(minus the tux jackets)
standing at attention on my doorstep
hair neatly combed
smiles in place
Bibles in hand
and I think
Damn why didn't I look out the peephole first?
Hello
We'd like to talk to you about
why out god is better than your god
why our church is better than your church
(oh, you don't go to church?
well, maybe you'd like to visit ours!)
why you should believe what we believe
why you will burn in hell if you don't
why
why
why
Why didn't I look through that damn peephole?
I send them away
and toss their tracts on top of the newspaper
Headlines
shout
religion and politics
politics and religion
and when did this country become
a theocracy anyway?
Those who don't fit
better get with the Christian agenda real quick
cause the men are coming
with their probes
(if I'd wanted the government up my cunt
I would have fucked a bureaucrat)
and I have no need
to be born again
cause I was born just right
the first time, thank you
So maybe I'll just hide here
behind my door
and be sure
to check to damn peephole
and not open it
until Santorum
is a dirty word again.
submitted for Fireblossom Friday #4, Imaginary Garden With Real Toads
7 comments:
And Jesus wept............
lol
They usually get me whilst I'm mowing the lawn.........
:)
wow...strong words...darn romney campaigners...smiles...
**clapping**standing ovation!!!!
Amen! Er, I mean...well said! All these extremist Christian clerics running around loose (and running for office) scare me. I look like shit in a burka!
Ha..ha...he is some presidential candidate. I really hope he doesn't make the cut.
and good tip, I always check the peephole ~
I usually ask them if there is golf in heaven. Seems to confuse them.
I have a sign on my front door that reads "No Soliciting." It keeps many of them away. The rest, who apparently cannot read, get my standard speech. I point to the sign and say "This means No Peddlers, No Preachers, No Prostitutes, No Politicians or anyone else starting with 'P' allowed. Good day."
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